People move out after graduation and that has been a tradition for the most and well, being a good pupil, I felt like doing so. So, I moved out… of the country. Went too literal there. *Sighs*
So I had to immigrate to USA. At first sight it might seem exciting and for quite some time it did to me too. Though how can you leave a place you were born in and lived all your life there? One simple can’t. I didn’t think it would be so hard to leave something, but to wrap it up into simpler words, I felt so much attached to the things around that I counted exactly 12 stairs at my home and memorized each of them like they were so precious a diamond to me (weird). It was like ‘Oh stairs, I don’t want to leave you brothers even when you gave me a scar on my face. I still love you stairs (more weird). Basically everything.
But it was all okay. I was moving to the greatest country in the world anyways right? At least that’s what I thought until I reached there only to realize it was not at all up to the hype. I mean yes it is great and all, it has got fun things and it has got Six Flags, and California (just a beautiful state, you stinking brain) and it is so clean everywhere that my brother licked all his ice-cream off the pavement, and people are nice everywhere (a girl bought him a new ice-cream cone after he finished licking) and then to compare with, India has got… We got GST! *sighs* But I still missed India.
So, god sends a cool gift and somehow I get to come back to my birthplace! (The cool gift here was a Walmart giftcard)
Fast forward to. me -15 minutes before landing at Ahmedabad airport
“So much has happened since I last saw you, I lost my social life (a thin social life which already was so thin and hence barely visible) it is just like yesterday, seems so fresh, and I went to a journey of self-discovery, and you and I had a fight.” (Awkwardly keeping quiet about that reference)
Fast forward to now-
I get off the plane, my friends come to drive me home (so nice of them to make me drive instead, that too after a 25 hour journey with little to no sleep), I get to home, get into the routine. Anyways, I had basically estimated minimum to no change since it had only been three months and good for me India develops at slow pace.
(Some reader – I thought you were talking good about the country since you love it.
Me- I’m trying okay?)
But ever since I got back I just find myself mostly swearing at things, I swear at the traffic, I swear at people, I swear at the heat and dirt, I swear at long queues and I swear at people in the queues, I feel like I have been a complete sociopath. There’s so much abundance of time here. It seriously annoys me how free people can be! Has been a week since I came and for a guy who never woke up before 10 on holiday here, I am waking up at 6 consistently although I have no important business. Moreover the same people who would have been my ‘mains’ feel like such annoying that I have to ask myself if they were always this annoying. It is funny how the things I’d have rather kept loving about has been a complete nuisance and now that I hate it as much as I hate to admit that I was a part of it. I don’t know, I think I keep doing that only because my parents are halfway across and I just want to be with them, I guess this is the real moving out.
So, I would still feel like I don’t really hate India, I mean I have lived here and it didn’t matter anyways, it won’t matter ever. How much ever I keep swearing there’s a little part of me left un-annoyed saying even if it were 3 decades instead of months I won’t ever stop loving the things I had left back. All these things, I carry a part of them and so I can’t just simply hate them because I have been distant or even if someone asks me to do as such. So no matter what, how much bad a break I am still going to love you.